All Together
Practical Tips for Helping you Parent in the Pews
“Assemble the people, men, women, and little ones, and the sojourner within your towns, that they may hear and learn to fear the LORD your God…” (Deuteronomy 31:12)
At Clover Hill, whenever there’s a 5th Sunday we have a family-integrated worship service. It’s a joy to have children’s ministry classes on most Sundays, but it’s also a joy to worship all together, from the youngest to the oldest, once every few months!
(Note: This Sunday’s attendance will be larger than normal, so please watch this short video for some advice on maximizing space to be welcoming for visitors.)
I know personally that it can be challenge to bring little ones into the worship gathering (especially the littlest, squirmiest ones!), but the challenge is worth it!
To help, here’s some practical tips for you parents to consider from William Boekestein. (And for you non-parents/those without small children, be supportive and encouraging to those that do!)
1. Train your children at home.
Expecting children to be still and quiet in church is asking a lot. But expecting children to do so only once per week without any practice at home is wishful thinking. Regular family worship—a simple routine of Bible reading, spiritual conversation, singing, and prayer—is the best primer for congregational worship and a crucial opportunity to nurture children toward spiritual maturity. Teaching children songs and hymns at home helps them learn to participate in corporate worship. It’s true that parents should distinguish family devotions from congregational worship. But age-appropriate reverence and focus can be cultivated at home as well.
2. Help your children participate.
To keep children from being mere observers in worship, we should explain what’s happening and prompt their involvement (Ex. 13:8, 14). Encourage their memorization and recitation of repeated worship elements like the Lord’s Prayer, the Apostles’ Creed, and the doxology. Teach them to pray, sing, and to listen to preaching. Spell out the meaning of Baptism and the Lord’s Supper. Have them help you give the offering. Churches can also give kids jobs like passing out bulletins—and they often make more exuberant greeters than adults! Active parenting in the pew can be exacting, but it’s also a rewarding part of our call to train children “in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4).
3. Be positive and patient.
Worship habits (and their consequences) are shared generationally (Ex. 20:5–6). And what we’re passing on involves much more—though not less—than liturgical motions. Our children will sense our heart for worship long before they understand the logic of our liturgy. Discipline may be necessary. But never lose sight of this goal: we want our children to sense that praising God in the congregation is the most joyful experience in the world (Acts 8:8, 39; 13:48, 52).
4. Get help from others with more experience.
The learning curve in training children to worship is steep, especially for first-time parents. We’ve never done this before! But others have. Talk to older parents; learn from their shortcomings and their successes. If need be, enlist the help of fellow church members. As a pastor, I’ve rarely sat with my wife at church. But when our children were small, we asked for and received a lot of help from other church members.
Mature believers have the inestimable privilege of personalizing Jesus’s invitation: “Let the little children come to me” (Mark 10:14). In him is life, for us and for our children (John 1:4). We should do all we can to bring our children to Jesus as he walks among his worshiping people (Rev. 1:9–20).
Church, let’s prepare our hearts to worship all together this Lord’s Day!
“One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.” (Psalm 145:4)
P.S. Since so many of you asked, here’s the video we showed last Sunday: